A case of suicide.

I was just happily going through the blogs of my newly added friend in orkut when i stumbled upon a post by one of my friend hari. The moment i read it, i was kind of confused as it was about hari's best friend mahesh. The post hari wrote was on mahesh's death.

The realization that mahesh was dead came to me as a silent shock that shuddered the depths of my mind. Though I didnt know mahesh personally , but I got aquainted to him through his comments in hari's blog as he was always the first one to drop in a word or two in his blogs.
An unbelievable moment for me as it is, I cant still fathom how could this situation have arisen in the first place. It was a case of suicide.

Going by the eulogies which his friends has showered on him posthumously, I can very easily infer that he was of the league of those rare genuises, that special species which has the knack to excel in whatever they chose to. An IIT graduate going on to join Irvine University California for research in mechanical and aerospace engg speaks about his technical brilliance . Suicide never looked like a thing that could have broken through his tremendous zeal for learning and jest for life. But it somehow did.

Mahesh blogs before his death is a chilling confession of his intentions to commit the unthinkable act but in a very lyrically crypt way. The most scary is his profile pic which just says "I was here !" .This may have been a cruel coincidence.Wish someone had deciphered his messages before he committed the act. Maybe he was giving the world a last chance to hold him back if it could . But it couldnt.

It gives me shivers just thinking what he must had been going through when he penned down those blogs knowing that people will be reading those after he erases himself from this world , when he changed his profile pic to the one which he knew he will never need to change again.

"Shit man! why did u do this.. i dont knw u but i really want to ask u.. why??? what gave you the inspiration to do this when u could ve done so much more in ur life? RE-reading your pre-suicide blogs quite a few times, my humble mind could smell a case of unrequited love and if that really is the case it will be the most undeserving ends of a budding legacy that you could ve created."

This whole act has quite shaken me . I cant fathom tomorrow my friends, my loved ones disappearing forever in this manner. I dont know how I will even cope with such an event if it happens to strike me ever. And i dont want to know also.

Suicide is an act of cowardice to which one resorts to in circumstances and in reasons, which still intrigues and disgusts the human world equally. Its a mystery how the human mind gathers the strength to kill itself. And in this case to leave a trail on the net to help onlookers gather evidence that lead to his self taken decision just speaks too much of his state of mind. Its scary and inconceivably dark. Horrifying.

I have my pity for the entire case. But this act cant be justified however volcanic or titanic the problems which mahesh might have had faced. I want to voice my concerns here because otherwise it can act as a very bad precedent for the many other strugglers like us. We cant simply accept defeat just because the situation is not favourable to us.

Mahesh was a naturally talented genius gifted in many ways. Not all are lucky to have those attributes. If someone was equipped fully to fight off this kind of a tendency it should have been him. His accepting defeat can deter the hopes of many other less talented guys who struggles with their own issues in life. Dying is not a solution, it can never be. We have to fight and win inspite of intial defeats . This is how life is defined and this is how it has to be dealt with.